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Monday, March 29, 2010

Even simple robots get it!

Guy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender.

The robot says, "What will you have?"

The guy says, "Martini."
The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man,
"What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "168."
The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration and medical technology.
The guy leaves, but he is curious...

So he goes back into the bar.
The robot bartender says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Martini."
Again, the robot makes a great martini gives it to the man and says,
"What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "100."
The robot then starts to talk about Nascar, Budweiser and John Deere tractors.
The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it one more time.
He goes back into the bar.
The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Martini," and the robot brings him another great martini.
The robot then says, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "Uh, about 50."
The robot leans in real close and says,
"So, you people still happy you voted for Obama?"

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Bad day?

Did you say you were having a bad day?
Here....these will make you feel better!



Now, get back to work and stop complaining! :0)

This would have solved a lot of problems over the years!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Dead flies....

Someone with great imagination,
a ton of dead flies,
and a boring job
draws these to entertain bored
little kids like us!

Monday, February 8, 2010

101%

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:

What Equals
100%?


What does it mean to give MORE
than
100%?

Ever wonder about those people
who say they
are giving more
than
100%?

We have all been in situations
where someone wants you to

GIVE OVER 100%...
How about ACHIEVING 101%?
What equals 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical

formula that might help
answer these questions:


If:


A B C D E F G H I J K L M N

O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:


1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15


16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O- R- K


8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


And:


K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E


11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%


But:


A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E


1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%


THEN, look how far the love of

God will take you:

L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D
12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%


Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:

While
Hard Work and Knowledge

will get you close, and Attitude will
get you there, It's the
Love of God

that will put you over the top!

Maxine....you silly old bag!

A few funnies, but the last
one is my dad's favorite! :0)


Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Check their homework!!!

This is a note a teacher received. :0)

"Dear Mrs. Jones,


I wish to clarify that I am not now,
nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer.

I work at Home Depot and I told my daughter
how hectic it was last week before the blizzard
hit. I told her we sold out every single shovel
we had, and then I found one more in the back
room, and that several people were fighting
over who would get it.

Her picture doesn't show me dancing around
a pole. It's supposed to depict me selling the last
snow shovel
we had a
t Home Depot.
From now on I will remember to check her homework
more thoroughly before she turns it in.

Sincerely,
Mrs. Smith